Do you get a throbbing clit when you smell latex or does your cock swell at the thought of handcuffs? Then BDSM might be for you. But how do you go about it? Just pay attention. And no, you don't have to bing Fifty Shades to find your inner Christian Grey. What it is BDSM stands for: Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism and Masochism. Usually one is the dom (dominator) and the other is the sub (submissive). And then of course the dom has the power and the submissive is submissive, duh. The most important thing in this relationship is that you trust each other completely and communicate clearly. Discuss what you find horny, what you expect and where your limits are. Be open to the other person's fantasies, but don't do anything you don't want. Also, always agree on a stop word/safeword for when things get too intense. And then immediately use a word that spontaneously gives you a dry ditch or limp dick.